Do We Want to Be the Church?

"Going to church" is a concept completely foreign to the Bible.

The church is not a building. It's not a place to go.
The church is not an event. It's not an activity to do.
The church is not a club. It's not a game to play.

Rather, the church is something to BE. It is the bride of Christ, the living breathing children of God.

Do we really want to be the church?

I've been thinking about this question quite a bit over the past few weeks. Ever since I was asked by an elder with whom I meet regularly. In no real particular order, below are some of the questions I've been asking myself:

• Do I really want to "do life" with other brothers and sisters in Christ?
• Do I really want the church more than I want my life lived my way?
• Do I really want my time with the church to be dominated by talk of Christ?
• Am I willing for my home to be shared with the church?
• Am I willing to simply drop by others' homes?
• Am I willing for others to simply drop by my home at any time?
• Am I willing to have a completely disruptable life?
• Am I willing to live within "life distance" from others rather than driving distance?
• Am I willing to live in a neighborhood "below my means" to live among the church?
• Am I willing to live in a home that may be "too small" to live among the church?
• Am I willing to sacrifice my routines for the sake of the church?
• Am I willing to sacrifice my leisure activities for the sake of the church?
• Am I willing to eat what I'd rather not for the sake of the church?
• Am I willing to change my plans for the sake of the church?
• Am I willing to arrange my schedule for the benefit of the church rather than myself?
• Am I willing to sacrifice my children's activities for the sake of the church?
• Am I willing to sacrifice my children's homework time for the sake of the church?
• Am I willing to disrupt my children's routines for the sake of the church?
• Do I really want my children to experience the church rather than "Sunday school"?
• Do I really want to children to experience the church more than what the world has to offer?

In essence, am I willing to sacrifice "my"?

Questions I continue to ponder.

A child's transitions to a new country

As difficult as it has been for me to transition from life in China to life in the US, I suspect it’s been more difficult for my eldest son. The younger son isn’t old enough to remember China. He’s only 8 months old and has been here for most of that time. My eldest, however, remembers.

He remembers relatives.
He remembers friends,
He remembers foods.
He remembers activities.
He he knows things are different, even in what he doesn’t remember.

Would you spend your Thanksgiving at a Chinese light exhibition? We did.

People say kids adapt quickly. People say kids are resilient. I’m sure they are. But I don’t wake up inconsolable in the middle of the night (four of the past five nights, twice last night). I don’t wake up from naps frantically looking for mama. He does. Neither of these things happened in China.

I suspect he still feels out of place. He still observes groups of kids more than plays with them, which was not true of his China social life.

I suspect the month away from mama last year has affected his sense of security.

I wish he could tell me what’s going on. He’s made new friends, but I wish he had the language and cognitive ability to explain his feelings. He understands cars and car seats, but I wish he could explain his need to held for hours after a nap. He loves story time at the library, but I wish he could explain what’s happening when he starts wailing at midnight.

In all of this, my wife and I are just guessing at how to parent well. What does he need? More firmness? More gentleness? Do we need to indulge his need to be held at the loss of hours in a day? Does he need be held and spoken to calmly at night or would it be better to firmly tell him to go to bed? (We’ve had marginal success with both.) I hope we don't screw him up too much. I really hope we don't screw him up too much.